one thing that i feel like God has been pressing upon my heart is the importance of remembering. i spoke in chapel in mid-september, sharing about the journey that God had led me on so far and some of the things he had taught me along the way. i was so blessed to be able to get feedback from students right away. God was so gracious to allow me to see some of the impact i made with this act of obedience. but beyond that, it was so good for my head and my heart to be reminded of God's faithfulness. and not just tales of God's faithfulness to other people-whether in the Bible or people that i know. but his faithfulness to me. not his faithfulness to the masses that i am one of. but his faithfulness that is specific to my life.

i don't think about his hand upon my life enough. i don't think about his plan for my life or what that even means nearly enough. when hard things happen, i don't often remember the purpose behind some of the hard things in my past and how God used them.

but i think i'm starting to. i feel like he smiles when i finally start to understand something that he's been waiting patiently for me to see. when i finally see that he is the lion who has been a part of my journey the whole time-not to hurt me, but to help me. not to wound me, but to heal me.

"‘I do not call you unfortunate,’ said the Large Voice. ‘Don’t you think it was bad luck to meet so many lions?’ said Shasta. ‘There was only one lion,’ said the Voice. ‘What on earth do you mean? I’ve just told you there were at least two the first night, and –’ ‘There was only one: but he was swift of foot.’ ‘How do you know?’ ‘I was that lion.’ And Shasta gaped with open mouth and said nothing, the Voice continued. ‘I was the lion who forced you to join with Aravis. I was the cat who comforted you among the houses of the dead. I was the lion who drove the jackals from you while you slept. I was the lion who gave the Horses new strength of fear for the last mile so that you should reach King Lune in time. And I was the lion you do not remember who pushed the boat in which you lay, a child near death, so that it came to shore where a man sat, wakeful at midnight, to receive you.’…‘Who are you?’ Shasta asked. ‘Myself,’ said the Voice, very deep and low so that the earth shook: and again, ‘Myself,’ loud and clear and gay: and then the third time ‘Myself,’ whispered so softly you could hardly hear it, and yet it seemed to come from all around you as if the leaves rustled with it." -The Horse and His Boy, C.S. Lewis

so, i've decided that i want to be more intentional about remembering, more intentional about being thankful. and i find that when i am, it is so much easier for me to trust. trust in his plan. trust that his plan is for my good. trust that his faithfulness is forever.

my goal is to reflect upon his faithfulness to me each night before bed. the thankful list might not always get written down, i want to be more thankful and to have grateful habits in my life. here's to being thankful.

"the LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O LORD endures forever." -psalm 138:8